Ever since Kiko and I moved to our new house, we have stalkers.
Well… I have stalkers. Two little girls from one of my elementary schools. One of them follows me around and calls me fat (a play on the name “dave” in Japanese. They pronounce “Dave” = “De-bu” and if you shorten it to “debu” it becomes the Japanese word for fat.)
Incidentally, I also made her cry one day by implying she was a little hefty herself. The other one dresses up in make up and ho boots and comes to my house. She also regularily lifts her skirt while I am teaching.
They are cute.
At any rate, every weekend they come to our house and leave me homemade chocolates and homemade candles. I usually send Kiko to the door to dissapoint them by having her say that I am not home.
Here is a note they recently left me:
It reads (in Romaji, Japanese written with English characters) “Dear David. You speak English very well. Please continue to teach us. From Haruna (fatty) and Kazuki (ho boots.)”
I was also surprised to look at the chalkboard at the back of the classroom and see this:
The blond hair gave it away. Note that I am also saying realistic English sentences (which I am sure I say all the time!) such as: “Hello.” “English!” “My name is …” “Orange” and “Red”.
This just makes me laugh. It was a sign below the shampoo and soaps at a hotel Kiko and I stayed at when we went to Matsuyama last weekend.
“We make up for deficiency.”
I need to go to a hotel that will make up for my deficiencies….I agree, little girls lifting their skirts is not cute! What are you teaching them?!
There is no such word as “allot” is there… …. shit. I really don’t know the difference between “a lot” and “allot”
As for my underage fetish… not quite. I almost pummeled two little boys today because they weren’t listening and I snapped at some girl who was being annoying. I am a bad teacher/person.
Chris, I went to the convenience store, but I am not sure what to take pictures of… any ideas?
Aww, leave Dave alone.
Congratulations on your underage stalkers, David. It only took 8 years for you to develop a lolicon fetish.
hehe, I’m liking this game!
Next challenge on “Dave can speak English well”, how about using “a lot” and “allot” properly? =)
For more of the ” David can speak English well” game, please , David pronounce the words ” here” and “beer”
That was always fun!
I’m glad you fixed that first message… it was pure ref. I thought you had reverted to your chinese ways.
oops, freudian slip, I used “her” in reference to dave! I meant Fat Dave and HIS cute stalkers. Then again, why is a little girl in ho boots who lifts her skirt up in class by any means cute?
and I meant to say, Poor Kiko, she’s already GOT herself a fat white husband. (My bad sentences can be easily explained by the fact that I’m Chinese! =P)
Dave indeed speaks English well =) (Quick, use your and you’re or there and their in a sentence!) haha
HAHAHAHA…I shouldn’t be laughing out loud at work in the morning, but I just did. Fat dave and her cute stalkers…Poor Kiko, she’s already for herself a fat white husband. Back hair and beer gut’s next i think?! (Just kidding!)